So, I meant to write this post last Thursday for “Thursday Series” but then decided to put it off to Friday because it would be the last day of the month and I thought it would be better on the last day of the month. A monthly recap thingy. (See how bad I am at this Thursday thing already?) Then I got busy with the yoga weekend thing and now here it is Monday. And the 3rd of June. Which is not a Thursday or the last day of the month. But I’m still thinking about what I was thinking about, so there’s that.

Awhile ago I started reading this blog about trail running and on a fairly regular basis, Eric – the author – would write about “Can-Do Moments”.  Those moments when you cross over the line between ‘can I?’, ‘maybe?’ to “Wow! I really can do this!.” I like that phrase – “can-do moment”.

I’ve been thinking about my own can-do moments a lot over the last week.  Life has been kind lately. Passing them out like candy to the point that gratitude is overwhelming me.

Originally, on Thursday  Friday, I was going to write about my own trail running. If you recall, at the end of April, I set my mind to mastering the trail at my office with a specific goal of getting out on that trail at least once a week. It’s a pretty challenging trail but it’s well maintained and gravel. The problems I’ve had with it are mostly about consistency – not getting on it consistently and somehow expecting my pavement time to make that trail easier. That doesn’t work. Inconsistency rarely works for me.

On Friday, I was having a long day and wasn’t feeling like my trail run. But I thought – do it and you’ll have the goal for the month. You can write that you did it  - have yourself a can-do moment. And I did it. I went out there that Friday and I buckled down and did my work and I was really proud of that. I had made it out on that trail at least once a week for all of May! GO ME! I’d seen deer multiple times. I’d been dive-bombed by bees. Crossed paths with chipmunks. Once, I passed some co-workers on a hill and later they stopped me to say how strong I looked running that hill – which was what made me think of the can-do moment thing. Not only am I running that trail regularly – but I’m looking good doing it! (Okay, so I’m a little vain.)

I’ll also say that somewhere in this month of doing these runs, they’ve stopped being a vendetta chore. I’ve actually started looking for forward to them except for when I don’t. I catch myself standing up in my cube multiple times a morning to look out the windows across from me and check the weather – thinking how pretty it is, how that air will smell nice (It smelled GREAT today!) and the sun coming through the leaves makes me happy. When I look out there, I start tapping my foot and calculating several times how many more minutes I’ve got until I can justifiably go to lunch and get this run done.

I’m really loving these trail runs. When I don’t want to do the trail run, it’s never about the trail. It’s always about something else – a deadline, a sore ass, not enough sleep. Never about running and never about the trail. Also, I find myself wishing I did more trail runs than pavement runs.  So there’s that.

Then this weekend came and I went and got myself all certified to teach yoga. I’M A YOGA TEACHER!! 200-hour course DONE! MAJOR CAN-DO MOMENT! And I’ve got a plan to start teaching 2 mornings a week before work. I’ve worked it out with my boss to make it happen. Peeps – this is a thing I am VERY HAPPY – capital letter HAPPY – about!!

Finally came today. After 2 intense 90-minute yoga classes over the weekend, I was sore. I felt good, but I was pretty sore in my core, a little sore in my legs. I thought to myself – just pack up the gym bag anyway. I always like to have a packed gym bag at the office. From my view over the cube, I saw a breeze running through the trees and sunshine on leaves and I thought - it looks pretty nice out there. Go, even if you’re sore. You’ll regret it if you don’t. So I went and as I got started I said - just get through the first mile. You’ll feel better when the first mile is behind you. And I did. Then I went into the loop and I thought three different times about cutting it short before I reminded myself –  You’re out here to get stronger – and this is how you do that, you don’t cut it short when it feels hard. You’re running up a hill – it’s SUPPOSED TO FEEL HARD if you’re doing your work.  So I ran the loop, and I went to the overlook and I almost talked myself into NOT going up the set of 20 steep stairs that mark the halfway point. But I said to myself – SELF, the top of these is the best part of this whole run. If you aren’t going up them, why did you run up here? So I went up them and I took the pause to survey all the land, watch the birds for a moment – remind myself what about this is a good idea -

when I saw her.

Two honey-colored leaf-shaped ears and big brown eyes looking up at me from a grassy low-spot – the dark green field grass so tall it was chest high to her and I couldn’t see her legs. A beautiful, healthy doe. So odd that she was all alone – I usually see at least 2 or 3 together, but I didn’t see anyone others near and she didn’t look sick. If I hadn’t made myself climb those stairs, I never would’ve seen her. And I thought to myself – what an awesome reward for doing my work today!

Then I took a deep breath, turned it around and started back – looking back to see her still watching me even as I got further away. Course reversed – it was the back part of the out and back – and usually the part I get tired. Back is harder. Maybe I should cut it short here? Nope – go do the run the way it should be done. You’ve got good weather today – this won’t last much longer. Enjoy it now. Make your left back into the loop and do the whole thing. So I did. Talked myself through the inclines that hurt and the steep parts that hurt worse and smiled when the down hill came. And just as I came through the final curve in the loop,

I spooked something in trees just in front of me, right before the path opens up. I caught a glimpse of honey-brown and knew my deer had taken the short cut I’d passed on. I’d dropped out of the loop about 10ft behind her and she’d trotted across the only piece of road I cross on this trail. As the bushes opened up I noticed she wasn’t alone.

The tiniest, sparkly white-speckled, knock-kneed fawn I’d ever seen was 3-ft from her. Both of them about 15-ft from me now.

She hadn’t been alone in the grass - the grass had just been taller than the fawn. Peeps – it was soooooo pretty my eyes watered. Up until mama turned and licked little’s butt. Awk-ward! C’mon – this is real life, not Disney. Apparently, deer mommas lick fawn butt. There you have it. I decided to un-see that part. I stopped and waited for mama to pick a safe direction – and for her and little to move off the trail – little stopping one last time to take a good look at me.  How could I not be completely awestruck? Friends – seeing that was a better reward for doing all my work the way I should have than I ever would’ve asked for. If I hadn’t done every little bit of that work, and let myself enjoy it – my timing would’ve been off and I wouldn’t have gotten to see any of that.  If I’d said – hey, I’m tired and I worked out all weekend, I’m skipping it – I wouldn’t have seen that. If I hadn’t committed to this goal of mastering this trail, I would’ve cut it short and then shorter, and missed all of that.

Knowing that you got to see something AMAZING because you did all your work and you’ve been dedicated to your goal.

Friends, that’s a can-do moment. Humbled, amazed, lucky, proud, in trail love. All at the same time.

And the Summer is just getting started.

Eric: Mind if we stop by Madtree and pick up some beer on the way home? It’s on the way.

Me: Do they have a TV? (we’re listening to the Reds game in the car)

Eric: Yes. They do.

Me: Then why don’t we hang out and have a beer while we’re picking up beer? Catch the last half of the game on the TV.

*****

Eric: Are you getting another beer?

Me: I have to. [Reds] started winning as soon as we sat down. We have to stay and drink ’til the end of the game. Unless they start losing. Then we have to leave.

Eric: Is that how this works?

I am nothing if not logical.

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Couldn’t decide which of the effect styles I liked better for this one. So…same shot, different shop.

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Day’s over. The truck is full of plants, cider, fudge and a dog passed out cold from Frisbee overload. Two humans grateful to have headed beyond the burbs for the day.

Also grateful to see the couch because we’re beat from all that R&R.

Me: Hey – isn’t that grilled cheese place up here somewhere too?

Eric: Oooooh.

Me: You know the one I’m talking about, right? From Andy’s other gig up there.

Eric: Yeah. I like the way you think.

Me: It might be a couple miles out of the way, but it IS up there. It’d be worth it. Fit it in between the fruit farm and the plant farm?

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John & Vicky’s van is parked out front. And Vicky, who is sunshine on two feet, remembers us coming in before – even though it was only once - 3 months ago.

I am all about teal lately, which translates into bench love here. This place has very clean, sleek lines on the inside.

There are neatly framed concert posters, album covers and instruments all around that whisper to me.

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You’ve not had a grilled cheese until you’ve had one made by a true Deadhead. Just sayin.

I don’t even know what Eric ordered because I am so wrapped up in my ham, bacon, pineapple & provolone. Yes, I said pineapple on my grilled cheese. Yes, it is FABULOUS.

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For a place in tiny neck of the country up North, Plain Folk is getting a rep for good music – benefitting from Facebook’s viral way of spreading news about band gigs. It’s how we found the place – through Andyman and Facebook.

Vicky & John like to mix it up and bring in artists from all over – Vicky says they are booked til November.

We brought Jack.

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Who got to play Frisbee at every stop we made.

Would love it if this one had been a little more clear but I didn’t have any time to set it up. I’d been wandering and caught up with the boys towards the end of their game.

This dog is the epitome of dignity. Until you bust a Frisbee out.

Then he’s a drunken co-ed on her 4th shot of tequila deciding that hightop looks like a good dance floor in platform heels. Wooohooo!

Unbridled glee. Seriously, the entire day is worth it to make him this happy.

It’s the first day of our 3-day weekend and I’m camped out on the couch-end, facebooking, twittering, coffee-drinking. Just being chill. I slept until 7:30am – an hour later than I’ve slept all work week and when Eric gets up later, I tell him this is exactly what I needed.  All week I’ve felt like my day would start so differently if I could just sleep

one. more. hour.

Eric pours a coffee and begins his boot up process. Asks me about my plans for the day. We have NOTHING scheduled for today. Or tomorrow. The free time feels luxurious. Decadent.

Me: I think I’m going to the plant farm today. I want some things for the yard. If I get them today, I can get them in the ground before the weekend’s out and take advantage of the rain.

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Me again (later): I noticed Andyman has a gig at the fruit farm. I think it’s near the plant farm – or near enough. To do both. Thoughts? I want to congratulate him on the new baby.

Eric: What time is he playing?

Me: 12-5.

Eric: I was thinking about tagging along to the plant farm, so yeah – if we can do both, see Andy – that’s cool.

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Me: I was thinking of bringing my camera. Play around. Get some practice. Is that going to bother you?

Eric: Not at all. I’m in no hurry today.  Should we bring Jack?

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Image  —  Posted: 05/27/2013 in Cincinnati Reds, Photos, Uncategorized
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Yesterday, I wrote about how there was this big inconvenient thing that has me a bit down and my stomach clenched tight.  Focused inward. Closed-off.

As Eric & I were sitting on the couch watching a movie, I said to him – “tell me everything is going to be okay”.

Eric: About the situation?

Me: About everything. About life. House renovations. Yoga teaching.  Work. The thing. Money. Mowing the yard. All of it.

Eric: Everything really is going to be okay.

I know that that’s something neither of us know for sure, but nevertheless, I needed to hear it said out loud. I think once in awhile ALL OF US need someone to say that out loud to us and sound convincing. Luckily for me, Eric is a pretty sincere guy. I was grateful that in our house, I can tell him exactly what I need to hear and that he will usually say it without reservation.

Then this morning, I walked out of the house and saw a little sage plant I put in last year offering  its very delicate looking hot pink flowers up to the overcast sky as if it had not a single problem. And I thought – wow, I really needed to see that. Something pretty. Beautiful. I don’t know why it struck me that way, but it did.  I was so grateful it was there – and in truth – though it looks delicate and pretty – that sage survived the Winter better than most of my other flowers.  It is deceptively strong. (I wish I’d stopped to take a picture for you.)

In that moment, that single precious moment of gratitude & beauty, I realized I had forgotten that lense. In all the upset of the past few days, I had been grateful for a few specific things – like knowing we have what we need in place to deal – but I had forgotten GRATITUDE AS A GENERAL PERSPECTIVE. I had put that way of thinking down and stepped away as if it were a filter on my camera. I try to go through life being grateful for things – big things, little things – doesn’t matter. Life just feels better to me when I can look at anything and say ‘hey, I’m glad you’re here’ or ‘isn’t that awesome!’. To that little flower – ‘hey, I’m glad you’re here. You’re awesome!’.  To not feel that – as a way of being in the world – has had me out of sorts. Fretful. Dark. An assault to my general nature.

As I waited on carpool, I didn’t want to lose that lifted feeling – so I whipped out my cell – and launched off a quick #5things on twitter to be grateful for. It was important to me to find and list them out right then – put them up in front of me as a sheild and say ‘I don’t care Friday! I am happy and grateful today!’.

So as a counterbalance to all of the things, and to get me back on track with who I prefer to be, I’m spending the day focused on gratitude. It is the best medicine there is to combat things that overwhelm. You can create an entire army of gratitudes to battle the gathering storm clouds if you just pause and look around.

I am so very grateful that -

  • the cafeteria changed over from French Roast to Hazelnut when I went for my second cup of coffee. Hazelnut rocks!
  • the sun came out and there is blue sky waiting on me out there in the big world
  • there is a trail out the back doorstep of my office, and at lunch, I plan to be running it
  • I am healthy and can go trail-running at lunch on a whim
  • Also, I may make time for pushups. Never thought I would be grateful for lots of pushups, but I am.
  • It’s payday. That’s always nice.
  • On the way out the door, the husband told me we had the evening together – no other plans in the way
  • I’m wearing a necklace a dear friend gave me. I have dear friends.
  • Also, I have deer friends I see out on the trail regularly.
  • I have decided on a color for the dining room rug that I think is final. It’s only taken me 5 years.
  • A trip to the plant farm is in my immediate future. There, I will buy more sage.
  • I will get to spend part of the weekend with a spade in my hand and getting filthy – if the weather cooperates.
  • Feeling the urge to get the camera out and go play -  if the weather cooperates.
  • It’s a 3-day weekend. None of those days require an alarm clock.
  • Reds game on Monday.

I could keep going on and on…little things, big things.

Even if sometimes it is complicated, this is my life, and I am most grateful for it.

What are you grateful for today?

I’ve been putting off writing this post…so much so that I put off writing last Thursday’s Thursday post completely and did a race recap instead.  Why?

Because it’s boring. I have to say it and there’s no way to be kind. When I wrote the last 2 Thursday posts on The Effective Kitchen, I was bored out of my ever-loving mind with what I wrote but told myself I was trying to be disciplined about a topic & a day – and so – write dammit! And what came out was just drivelish exercise in phonics to me.

If I’m bored writing it, I doubt your interested in reading it.

I DETEST BOREDOM. At the office. At the house. At the gym. Boredom is a dementor to my soul.

So I decided to change things up a bit – still write on Thursday, but dedicate it to whatever is on my mind. Even if that’s not a thing to do with kitchens, gyms, photos, yoga, existentialism, fundamental studies of fried mozarella…

What is on my mind this week is sticking my head in the sand. Retreating into fallback position.

The husband & I have had an event breeze through that effectively blindsided both of us – one that is upsetting, disruptive and expensive to fix. We have both been exhausted by it – though neither of us is sleeping well. I’ve had a knot in my stomach for the better part of a week now and Eric has caught the headcold I had after Block the Sun 5k.

Our house is STRESSED OUT.

Luckily, this is something we both understand. So we’ve kept to a quieter profile around the house this week, called in the professionals that we need. Which is a strange thing in and of itself – to have to hand matters over to others. Between our professions & our hobbies – Eric & I have a pretty expansive range of talents. When something is bigger than the two of us can handle – it’s scary.

We’ve circled the wagons, drawn down the blinds and been thankful that we have the resources available that we do. Focused on staying connected while still giving each other some space to de-stress. I did happy hour with the running group. He took the dog out for a stinkification session – aka creek hike. We’re planning for a 3-day weekend of tackling house projects & seeing friends. Going to the Reds game on Monday.

Also, I’ve given myself permission not to do 2 runs which I don’t care for. I’ve done both of them 3xs already. I don’t like them and they don’t like me – but because all my friends do them – & 1 of them is free, I sign up. Ya know what? It’s free to not do it too! I’m just not going to do runs I don’t like anymore. I mention it because the free one is this Saturday. After a sleepless week, I want to sleep in on Saturday. So instead, I’m looking for some small alternative runs that aren’t too expensive and aren’t on Saturday.

I’m falling back for the weekend. Taking it easy. Dreaming of simple things. That’s what’s on my mind.

I mentioned 2 weeks ago that I had signed on to do a 5k as part of trying to get me focused on my running goals.  This was that one.  It’s hard to write about – not because the run went horribly or anything – but because I’m feeling kind of ‘meh’ about it. I needed to give myself a couple of days to decide whether to write about it at all and if so, how I wanted to write about it. Ugh.  But writing race recaps is one of those things I do, so…

Going into this race, I knew VERY LITTLE about it. I found it on a racing calendar website and everything I could extract from it I got from a flyer. It was through Glendale – which is a very pretty area of town – packet pickup was outside my regular running store – there would be an after-party at a nearby golf course – and I knew who would be timing/organizing it.

In the interest of full disclosure – I have done several races now with the company in charge of organizing/timing the race. Color me VERY unimpressed.  I could itemize issues I have seen/experienced, but in the interest of not being sued, I’ll keep them to myself.  So yeah,  I’m at the point with them that just seeing that company listed as the organizer makes me second-guess whether I want to do the run.  I have a bias here, and it’s not a good one. So you should probably take this recap with a grain of salt.

I decided to do this one because the time worked, there was an after-party, and looking at 2012 results – Maine & I both had a chance at age-group top 3 if we ran well. Maine would have a good shot at winning her age-group if she ran the way she has been lately. Of course, that depends on current registrations too, but it was something to look at. I’m a data girl. Registered.

Here’s what I know:

The registration was $30, which $25-30 is average around here these days for a 5k. When we got there, this fee included a string bag & a tiny tube of an SPF that it is unlikely I will use because I’m picky about sunscreens.  That is very little swag compared to most of the $30-5k’s around here.

There was very little accessible off-street parking and even less that wouldn’t get trapped in by the race. We ended up parking about half-a-mile away even getting there reasonably early.

There was a tiny race-map on the flyer copied from a Map-My-Run shot, but no link to it. To get the elevation profile, I had to recreate the map from the tiny little picture in my own Map-My-Run account. I don’t understand why they couldn’t link that on the website or make a bigger picture available w/an elevation profile. If they did, I couldn’t locate it easily.

The route itself was a good route. A couple decent hills. It looped back on itself in a wild figure-8 so they were able to be efficient using one water stop that you passed twice – without making you go over duplicate territory. I respect efficiency, so I liked that a lot. I do feel the water stop was under-manned with only 2 guys there – while other areas seemed to have more than enough volunteers wandering without task. But all in all, I was excited about the route. Also, I didn’t stop for water – I don’t for 5ks anymore unless I’m overheating.

Most of the volunteers along the course were not cheering. Some were. But most were not. This energy permeated a lot of the event for me. I’m sure they were very enthusiastic about this event the first 2 times they put it on, but the energy for this time was a bit lackluster.  As I was struggling with my race a bit, this lackluster energy was not helpful.

For my own race, when I finished I told Eric that this run just felt a lot harder than it should have for the prep work I did & the course. I never got into a zone with it and felt a lot of pressure in my chest/abs for a good bit of it. When I got into the final stretch, I had very little kick to give.  I’m attributing this to the fact that I came down with a sore throat Sunday evening – I was probably already getting sick on Saturday night. That being said, I shaved 26 seconds off of the 5k I did 3 weeks before. No PR, but closer. Also…

I ALWAYS make it a habit of starting my Garmin before I cross the first mat and stopping it after I cross the last mat. My Garmin isn’t a fancy version, so I have no problems with satellite delays. It acts as a stopwatch & interval timer for me.  Results are usually (this race being the one that makes me say usually, rather than always) over whatever the actual chip time is because I’m conscientious about making sure it’s always a little over. The last time I ran with this race company, my Garmin was dead-on the chip time they gave me.  Okay. This time, my Garmin was 7 seconds under the chip time they gave me. My Garmin gave me a better time.  Not sure how I feel about that.

There was a girl I was playing leap-frog with by 7-10 ft distances throughout most of the race. At the last significant hill (probably .5 miles from finish), she was in front of me by 10-ft. I decided her ass looked smug.

Yes, an ass can look smug.

Whether she meant it to look smug or not, I don’t know, but it was mocking me that she had passed me yet again. She had a mocking, smug, passing ass. I’m sure she’s a very nice person when you take in more than just her ass.

Hills being my thing, I put some energy into passing her and decided from that point forward that she was NOT passing me again. She didn’t. I kept up the passing effort through to the finish and on the last 10-15 ft to the finish, I checked over both of my shoulders to be sure that she wasn’t going to sprint past me and she was not in my sight anywhere near me.  Her chip time has her 2-seconds behind me. At 2-seconds behind me, I would’ve seen her.  She wasn’t there. Not sure what that means either.

When I crossed the finish line, I was handed a water bottle that had been sitting on a table in the sun. I reached into a nearby cooler – all the water bottles were on top of the ice, not in it. Reaching to the lowest point, my water was barely colder than warm. There were bananas.

At the last race we did with this organizer, the awards were given at the after-party. So, we moved our little band over to the after-party to see if Maine had taken her age group. They never announced the winners there. I guess they did it back at the race a mile away – no one told us how that was going to work.  However, they did announce the winners of the golf classic that had combined their after-party with this one.

There were no free drink or food tickets with the registration. Beers were $5 for 12oz, or $20 for an ‘unlimited’ wrist band.  Silent auction – got outbid on a Reds basket. 2 bands  –  both of which were pretty good.  A food truck with burgers & such that was affordably priced. All told, I think we put out another $40-45 at the after-party, which totals that up to a $70-75 night.  That seems a bit pricey for a 5k to me – I think at least 1 beer ticket should’ve been included with registration. Other races in the area do a $30-40 registration and include 2-4 drink tickets at the party.

Highlight of my night was getting to play soccer & catch with Maine’s little boy for a good part of the night.  Also, there was a volunteer from Boston that was a complete hoot to talk to at the silent auction area. She was an absolute riot! And any night out with my husband is a good night. Got a video of a giant dancing hand (see previous post).

Without a few changes, such as a swagged-up registration & greater clarity around the festivities, pretty sure I wouldn’t do this one again even if the route is pretty.  It was just a little too pricey for the experience and if the volunteers aren’t even into it…gotta wonder why they don’t find another fundraising activity that excites them more.  The point is to raise money for a cause (melanoma), not to put on a race, but if you’re going to put on a race to raise money – make it worth doing. Swag it up. Attract attention and the following will grow to raise the hell out of those funds.

Upcoming weekend is yoga teacher training, so no races then. I have a free entry to a race on the 25th if I want it, and considering another race for the morning of the 27th.

Took this at a run after-party last night.

Because after the cornhole picture, things moved onto the dance floor.

You can probably move ahead 30-45 seconds in the video – except for that his (her?) dance partner is just fabulous.

Never seen anything like it.